"My Mini-Me."

Pseudo-sofistication.  This was (is) one word I really like.  I quite fancy the word because it is so very pregnant with meaning.  And it has a lot to do with how we are raising our children in this era.

I was chatting with a fellow parent and our conversation was cut short because she remembered that she had to fetch her daughter from Ballet class.  It was a Monday afternoon.
Monday is for ballet.

Another parent at school was raving about her son's new favorite activity.  Martial Arts with coach Kim.  Tuesday is for Karate.

I went to a locally-known music school to inquire about classes.  It was Wednesday.  The school was brimming with children.  Apparently, Wednesday is for Piano (or violin).

Thursday is for math supplementary class (Kumon, Singaporean math, Practical Mathematics, etc. etc).  On top of the already numerous sheets of paper for homework, the six-year-old boy had more math classes to attend, outside school.

Friday is for Painting.  "Woohoo!" for most kids.  At least for the younger ones who are finally allowed some "messy play" at the Art Studio for kids.

Saturday and Sunday, Soccer, Badminton, Swimming or all of the above.

Such a tight schedule for children aged 4 and above, don't you think?  Whatever happened to "free play" and going outside to play with neighbors, or having play dates at friends'  homes?

Whatever happened to CHILDHOOD?

We try so hard to manage our "stresses" in life, from over-crowded cities to over-packed schedules, and here we are, as open-minded parents, doing the exact opposite to our children. We load them with stressful activities.

I say "stressful" because we are so afraid to keep the children "idle", even for just a day.  And we think that by providing them with all these "brain-feeding" activities and schedules, we are helping them advance in life.  I would say, from my nearly-20 years of teaching, the children are just falling into the same trap we are in. STRESSED ADULTS.  And we push them to Pseudo-sofistication.

We try so hard to give the children "an edge."  And that is not wrong at all.  It is, by all means, a noble and almost-obligatory job as parents.  And by some unconscious force, we try to fashion them into our little selves, or extensions of ourselves. And we become so caught up with pushing them to be ahead of the pack, that we forget about their ages and their respective interests.

These are children!  They are meant to play and discover the wonders of the world, not be confined to four walls of concrete, memorizing, following pre-set movements, and regimented styles of learning.  They should be playing outdoors, feeling the grass on their feet, holding sand and rocks, pouring water into bottles, watching bugs crawl on leaves.  They will, in their later years, be spending more than enough time inside a room, facing a computer terminal, and watching a screen.  Why start "imprisoning" them this early?

Maybe we think that if they learn all the "finer things in life" at an early stage, they will BE at an advantage over the rest of the children their age.  But have we ever thought of how every single child we know is already enrolled in all these courses anyway, that our apparent "edge" is already the norm?  And when we realize that, we will then PUSH our children more to doing something else, something more difficult.  So who is to blame for all these "stress-related illnesses" we are feeling  these days?  WE ARE!

Let's break the cycle of this Psuedo-sofistication.  It is a farce, a fallacy, an irrelevant occurrence.  Children need to be children.  They will reach their own maturity when the time is right.  Leave them some room to play, grow and explore their environment, without us having to schedule their lives for them.  Let the children play!!!